Since your parents split up there might have been some really big changes in your world. This can be really hard to get used to.
When parents separate, it can have significant effects on you and your daily life. Here are some of the changes that children and young people may experience when their parents separate:
1. Emotional changes:
It is normal to experience a range of emotions when parents separate, including sadness, anger, anxiety, confusion, and guilt. These emotions can be intense and long-lasting. You might need help and support from an adult that you trust to understand and manage these emotions.
2. Changes in living arrangements:
Parents may need to make changes to your living arrangements following a separation, which can impact on daily routines and a sense of security. Parents are encouraged to talk honestly to you about this, so if you are worried it is important that you let them know.
3. Changes in finances:
Separation can also impact families’ finances, which can affect access to basic needs like food, clothing, and healthcare. Children may also need to adjust to changes in family income or a new standard of living. You have a right to expect that all of your basic needs are being met. You may want to talk to an adult you trust if you find that you don’t have the same lifestyle you did before so that they can assess how best to help.
4. Changes in relationships:
You may need to adjust to changes in relationships with both parents and other family members. Sometimes you may also need to navigate new relationships with step-parents, step-siblings, or other new family members.
5. Changes in routines and schedules:
Separation can disrupt your daily routines and schedules, which can make you feel insecure. For example, you may need to adjust to new mealtimes, bedtimes, or school schedules. If you are finding this hard you might want to let someone know, they might be able to do something to help.
It can be really difficult when it comes to working out where you fit within the new family setup and building relationships with step-siblings. Relationships with stepparents can also be difficult. Things do get better though and all of your worries at the moment will soon become memories. Tell people how you’re feeling, and they will want to help you. With time these things tend to iron themselves out. (https://naccc.org.uk/for-children/information-about-changes/)
Using Contact Centres
Using a contact centre to spend time with someone that you don’t see very much anymore, can be a worrying and exciting time. Contact centres are safe places to do this and the people who work there are very experienced at supporting people in your situation. When you visit a centre:
They will have some information about their service for you to take away with you.
They will spend time with you telling you about how they will work with you and help you to feel safe at the centre, before the first session.
They will show you around before the first session.
They will help you to understand any rules.
They will ask you if you have any questions or worries.
We want you to enjoy your time at the contact centre. Let the people who work there know how your feeling, so that they can support you. Remember, you won’t be there for long. Contact Centres will want to support your family to move on to better contact options as soon as possible. (https://naccc.org.uk/for-children/using-contact-centres/)
